I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Randomize
