Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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