well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
