The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
