"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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