Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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