it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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