check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
