I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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