Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
