Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
it was like eating out sand paper
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
