Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
