DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
