There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
