remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize