this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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