This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
