can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
