It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
