so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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