i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
