so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
