Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
