she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize