we have officially lost it.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize