I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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