Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
