We won't sleep together?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I love having hate sex.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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