Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
