i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
