If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
