i can't believe i had my finger in that
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
