Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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