I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
