i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Operation Purity has been aborted
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
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