The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
