I wish I could teleport
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
