Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
