i just had sex bonerless
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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