She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
