I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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