Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
