Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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