is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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