I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
