dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize
