I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
