Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I CAN MOONWALK!
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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