This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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