i can't believe i had my finger in that
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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