he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
